| all monsters and dust |
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"The device, called the Mosquito ("It's small and annoying," Mr. Stapleton said), emits a high-frequency pulsing sound that, he says, can be heard by most people younger than 20 and almost no one older than 30. The sound is designed to so irritate young people that after several minutes, they cannot stand it and go away."
I want to start saying "take it easy" as a parting greeting instead of "goodbye" or whatever other lame expression I am currently using. It just sounds so convincingly like the kind of thing the carefree person that I wish I were would say. Yeah, I completely can't pull it off.
it smells like winter
 On a scale of The Office (orginal version) where 1 is "not at all like The Office" and 10 is "exactly like The Office," my workplace is about a 9. It loses a point because the racism and sexism is a little less overt and because it isn't a paper company. This is frustrating mainly because any hopes I had of turning this crazy experience I have been living into fodder for a hit British sitcom have been dashed.Apologies, as usual, for being out of touch. I have been busy losing my mind and finding (parts of) it again. The change of season came so quickly this year, and I wasn't prepared. Of course, the whole thing coincided with eleventy frillion other all-around bad things happening to me, so I was a little distracted, (denial is hard work), and my mild seasonal affective disorder had blown up into full fledged depression before I even had a chance to adjust to the time change. So, things were a bit stressful for a while there, but it appears they are starting to improve. The best evidence I have for this so far is that, despite receiving even more disrupting news this past week, I've stopped having heart-stopping nightmares of mortal peril every night and started instead to dream that I am living with indie rockers and fully fictional characters from television shows. This is a little bit embarrasingly adolescent, but so is the fact that I am having nervous breakdowns all the time. I feel like I am 16 again. I need to start light therapy again ASAP, because clearly I have a chemical imbalance.
close call
I live one street away from the route of the mailman who has been stealing people's mail for the past 5 years.
a weekend of firsts
This weekend, I woke up sitting bolt upright in bed for the first time ever. I thought that was something that only happened in movies and on TV, but apparently it's real. And scary. I think I was having a panic attack during my nightmare, which is like a nightmare squared. I saw my first black squirrel. IN MY BACKYARD. I didn't think we had any around here. But obviously, WE DO NOW. Fuck was that ever scary. I mean, grey squirrels already freak my shit out, but black ones? They're just sinister. As an aside, if you have a squirrel phobia, DO NOT watch Charlie and the Chocolate Factory. Because, nightmares. And, I ate the first persimmon of my life this weekend. At first this seemed like a positive experience, but in the end, they are kind of pasty and strange-tasting, like so many Indian deserts. [I also had a mini-nervous breakdown, but that was not a first.]
hobo time
1. Halloween Controversy! "We forget sometimes there are kids who feel pressure by dressing up, and that it's not the best holiday for every kid in the world. You can be a hobo only so many times." But on the other hand, "Halloween is a flare-up of huge social problems we're facing. If you show me a United States with no holiday where you can be creatively weird, I will show you a United States with no hope." 2. "He did not always, however, give [the boy's mother] the help that she needed. Famously, she once wired him when she was desperately short of cash, saying 'Wife and baby starving send money soonest.' He characteristically replied 'Sorry no money suggest eat baby.' " 3. ''A lot of these people were the forgotten of the living and after they died they became the forgotten of the dead. If I knew I had clothes at the cleaners, I'd pick them up. If I had a loved one at the cemetery, I'd pick them up." 4. Scary things I did for Halloween: forced myself to call the phone company, which I had been putting off for, oh, a year; and let a drunk person cut my hair. (Me.) That didn't turn out so well.
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"The mind of the thoroughly well informed [person] is a dreadful thing. It is like a bric-a-brac shop, all monsters and dust, and everything priced above its proper value."
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